This is a story I made up and text to a buddy of mine that was hunting @ 70 miles away. We kept reporting what we were seeing, complaining about the weather and so on. It was almost 3:00 pm and I hadn't seen a deer in hours so out of boredom I wrote this and sent it to him. It was opening day of muzzle loader season 2017. The forecast was 28 degrees with a NW wind. Dang that ought to get them moving. I settled into my stand at 6:50 am. 30 min. before legal shooting light. Unaware of the cold, too hyped up on black coffee and big buck fever I sat and prepared myself for what was most likely going to be the best hunt of my life. As the gray and black shadows of pre dawn slowly changed from massive 10 pointer browsing along the tree line, into clumps of greenbriar and frozen poke, I heard it..... crunch, crunch, crunch. Deep in the woods behind me I heard just what I had expected to hear. Just what I had waited all my life for. That crunch, crunch was no doubt that big old buck that I've been waiting on for so long. And even if it was just the big 9 pt. with the split brow tine, or that perfect 10 with the little kicker on the left beam, that would work too. crunch, crunch, crunch. I heard him getting closer. I checked my watch. 14 min till shooting time. crunch, crunch, twig snap.... silence. Dead still silence. Then he started to move again, but he took a left. Oh good Lord don't let him turn west on me, he's sure to wind me if he does. Crunch, crunch twig snap...silence. I held my breath until I nearly passed out. Cussing myself for downing that last bit of coffee before I got out of my truck, I was sure i was BUSTED. But no. As luck would have it he turn back north. Crunch, crunch twig snap...my whole body was shaking from a toxic mixture of cold, needing to pee, and big buck fever as I took one more look at my watch. 2 min till the season opens. I shoulder my old smoke pole and move ever so quietly to my right. Crunch, crunch, crunch. Just as the first rays of sunlight beam across the field he comes into view. The sun glistening off of his....SHELL??? #*#*#*#*#* ARMADILLO !!!